Hi Friends,

If there is something you want to improve, the first step is to track it.  This tactic is most commonly used with finances and weight loss, but it can apply to anything.  Its true, if you want to improve your finances or health, just in tracking what you do you will automatically improve because you do or don't want to write it down.  I have heard about tracking your happiness before, but to me it was kind of an abstract concept.  

We all have access to google calendar, or just a regular calendar  I decided to start tracking how happy I feel.  I went into my google calendar, and created a "new calendar" for each rating, 1-10.  I color coded it, because I like color, I like how pretty my calendar is full of pretty colors!  On average I rate myself as a 6-8 for my own happiness level.  But I want to get to an average of 9-10 every day.  

I have been trying to do things to raise my happiness level, but I didn't feel like it was working.  Now with the new year, I am determined to make this year, the best year yet, but how?  I am going to track it.  My determination came because the other day I had a 10 day.  It was amazing, I felt so wonderful.  I organized/cleaned my place for 5 hours.  This is something I do once a month, but this time I also hired a house cleaner during that chunk of time.  I hate cleaning, so it was really nice for someone to clean, while I organized my stuff, and dealt with things that I have been needing to get to.  I felt so incredible when we were finished.  I felt so loved,  and compassion for myself!  And I realized I do actually need help, my life is way too busy for me, I deserve help.

So now I am tracking each day.  Eventually I will see a pattern, I will notice if the things that make my life a 9-10 are things that I can control, or things I can't control.  I will notice what I do that makes me feel good and not so good, and then intentional do more of those things that make me feel good, or put myself in environments that make me feel great.  After a month, I'll post my progress.  

I am also noting the different factors that contribute to how great I feel or not, like if I slept well, or what I ate/drank.  You can add a comment below the "title" where I have my rating.

I would encourage you to do the same thing.  It won't take long for you to just jot down your rating for the day, if you have google calendar in your phone, it will take you one minute to rate your day, once you have the different tabs set up.

So here is to the best year yet!
Love and happiness to all of you!

Hello Everyone, hello 2019!

Personally I love the new year, its a perfect time to look back at what we did well, what we learned, what we can do better this year, and what new things are we looking to bring into our lives, or what new direction do we want to head.  

Personally I believe if you want real change pick the tiniest thing you can and modify or better yet replace it with an upgrade or an experiment.  Check out my last years article on new years resolutions titled "Happy 2018!" if you want ideas.  What I love to do in the beginning of the year is make a list of at least 100 things, more is better in this case, of all the things you want to do, see, enjoy, experience, achieve, become, give, manifest, create....  Just like a vision board you'll want to post it or keep it available to check in with every once in a while.  Then when you look at it, you'll notice that you achieved that "goal"  I'll call it a goal since that's the most general word I can think of in this moment to capture all of those desires.  Its really fun when you realize that you achieved them sooner than you thought.  It would also be really fun to include your entire family in on this too.

For me personally I want to make this year my best year that I have lived so far.  I want to manifest a house that I own.  I want to manifest a man, I'm SO ready for you.  This past year I have been working on and learning manifesting, meditating and really integrating different aspects of myself.  Learning how to love myself better.  I think it was two years ago that I even considered self love a good thing, I used to think that's what egotistical people do. haha, I just have to laugh at myself.  As I have learned to surrender (still learning!) I notice that life has gotten a bit easier, I really like it.  I want to heal my gut health issues, and just live the best possible version of my life that possibly exists.  

I was talking to my friend Heather, who I met at a seminar, and so we can talk about all the woo woo stuff, and how we want to heal our bodies, like Joe Dispenza teaches, or manifest a lot of money, like Abraham Hicks teaches.  I told her that she should write a book, she's got quite a lot on her plate, but I know that without a doubt she can heal and integrate all of it.  And as I was telling her she should write a book, and I know her story will be incredible, she is so fascinating to talk with, I decided I should take my own advice.  So I will keep an online journal here, about my journey of manifesting my home, and just living the best year ever.  That I hope to turn into a book one day.  I'm going to create a separate google calendar just to track how I am feeling physically, emotionally and energetically, because its all related.  I hope you enjoy it, and most of all I hope that this inspires you to reach for something higher and/or bigger.

Much love, Jessica

Good morning! I'd like to share how wonderful I think the book the Woman Code is by Alisa Vitti is. 
Here's the link to her website: https://www.floliving.com/
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Its hard to summarize this book because what each person will get from it will be a bit different.  For example the things I remember most from the book and what I needed to work on.  But after applying her steps to how I eat, and plan my life my life and monthly pains have gotten so much better!  I really believe every woman NEEDS to read this book.  

I've always had very painful monthly symptoms, to the point that I had to schedule work around it, or call out sick.  Every 28 days that's a lot to be calling out sick.  We all have some issue we'd like to work on, this book will iron that out, and even improve some things that you never thought twice about!  The app is also pretty great too, it will give you suggestions on how to heal a symptom if you area experiencing any.  We as a society in the US, for the most part accept aches & pains as a normal part of life, but that's not true!  It doesn't have to be a normal part of life.  When we get some kind of pain that is our body telling us that something is off, and there is an easy solution to heal it without pain killers, we just need to learn what they are.  For example did you know that you experience less pain if you are fully rested?

I used to always start my morning on empty rushing out the door because I needed to get things done.  But I never forgot my coffee :)  Now after reading the woman code and listening to Dr. Jonh Gray I have changed my habits.  Now my morning routine (when I have time) is:  
I wake up and make my bed, for manifesting fun I do an "I like" list

I open up my salt and pour a tiny bit in my hand to suck on the salt rocks while I drink water for 5 minutes.

I use the bathroom

I make hot lemon water and walk a loop around my block (about 15 minutes) I usually eat a bite of something before I go, like an apple or nuts.

Then I make my breakfast.  The bigger the better!  Today I had an egg with tomato and spinach, a pear, and some cashew yogurt with chia seeds, ground flax seed, and goji powder, oh and coffee :)  Now I wait until I eat my meal to have coffee, where as I used to have it before doing anything else.

This entire routine takes me roughly an hour, because I eat slow, and usually do other things at the same time, like write an article :)

If I were rushing and at home, because I'm on the road quite a bit, I would add lemon to cold water while I ate salt and continued to drink more water for 5 minutes.  Then make a smoothie with plenty of fat in it, like peanut butter, or coconut oil, while making my coffee at the same time.  Then bring both to go with me, or drink while I am getting ready.

While on the road, still drink 5 minutes of water first thing.  Then I always have power bars, apples, nuts, and coconut water with me.  So eat while I'm getting ready, then bring a coffee with me out the door.  If you are one of those people that can't get started without coffee, I suggest still drinking 5 minutes of water, then doing some kind of exercise for 2-5 minutes.  Like sit ups, yoga, or a 5 minute workout video, I have playlists of 5 minute workout videos on youtube saved on my phone.  Try it :)  

What I love about this is that for the first time I didn't take pain killers at all during my period, and I feel great!  Normally I am in bed trying not to throw up.  I wish happiness and health for all of you and I hope that sharing my routine will make your health discovery a little bit faster.  

Sending love, Jessica

Hello :)

Today's article is inspired by two people a coworker, and one of my good friends.  At the start of the year I wrote that I would write a new article every week.  Its been three months since that article...  I've been dating, am an auntie to be, and with my job which poses a serious challenge to dating, its tough to squeeze in taking care of my own life on the less than one day a week, which I have to cram all of that into.  Never mind catching up on sleep.  I imagine this is what mom's feel like. 

I was talking about this with a friend, who like me is also trying to build a new career on the side of her full time job, never mind the social life or peace of mind.  And she was saying she just came to peace with it, she's OK that she'll never be a super clean person or be the type that cooks all the time...  And that was such a big reminder for me.  When I heard and her words and felt that acceptance in my body I felt so much relief.  Its OK if my house is a mess even though I'm building an organizing business.  Its OK if my mail is piled up and only the bills are dealt with.  Its OK, if I'm struggling to find time for all of the important people in my life, since I'm not home half of the month, and trying to build a new relationship.  Sometimes life is like that; and when I heard my friend's words I let it be OK, that when I am home, I feel like my life is a mess.

I share this with you, the public, because I want you to also try on the idea of forgiving yourself for whatever you have been trying to be or accomplish but in your eyes have not succeeded yet.  This web page and philosophy all began because I had many habits that I didn't like and knew the best way to change them was to make the tiniest change I could and commit to it until I forgot about it.  But for right now, I'm practicing forgiveness and I'd like to offer this idea to you.  Like Dr. Wayne Dyer (listening to him yesterday) said when talking about Dowisim, there is a time for feeling happy, there is a time for feeling frustrated, there  is a time for feeling sad, there is a time for feeling overwhelmed, there is a time for feeling ecstatic or euphoric.  In my life momentarily, there is a time for feeling overwhelmed, there is a time for my house being a mess, and there is a time for having to come back to my own philosophy just to find time to squeeze in a workout or meditate, which sometimes is just 5 minutes a day.  And its all OK :)

In the moment of hearing and truly accepting my friend's words I was practicing forgiveness to myself and it feels like a weight has lifted off my shoulders.  I want this for you too!

So I'd like to thank my coworker, who inspired me to write. Just because I told you about this website, that reignited my excitement about it, when it fell by the wayside because of life.  Thank you <3

Love to all,
Jessica

Do you drink a ton of water and yet still feel dehydrated?  Or like you're still thirsty even though you just downed a liter of water? I have been one of those people most of my adult life.  Its super frustrating to drink so much water, go to the bathroom a lot and yet still feel thirsty, ummm what is going on??? 

I'm sure there are many people that are similar to me, so I'd like to share what I have recently learned.    This will be beneficial to anyone that is very athletic, lives/travels in a hot climate, or my drinking buddies and wine lovers :)

I started doing hot yoga every day since October.  I absolutely LOVE it, but I was having a hard time drinking enough water, it just would not fit in my body.  Not to mention my previous condition of drinking tons of water to begin with, yet still feel thirsty.  I'm healthy, athletic, and eat vegan gluten free 95% of the time, and at least one meal a day is raw.   I expressed this frustration to some of my yoga teachers.  And she suggested adding something to my water, and drinking coconut water.  I already drank quite a bit of coconut water, I love it.  But I implemented what she said.  I began drinking a coconut water minimum once a day.  I love the zico bottles, so that is very easy for me to measure.  Then I would add something to my water, an orange, a lemon, some mint, a strawberry, blueberry, cucumber...

After a few days, (probably it only took a day, but when I noticed) I was feeling better, more energetic - a symptom of dehydration is just feeling very drained- and to my surprise I was craving less water.  Craving less water was a first for me!  Now I can just take a hot yoga class when ever I want, I don't need to plan and prepare, and make sure that I drink enough water by a certain time, like I was doing previously.

I remember reading an article somewhere, that said that as we get older our body naturally doesn't retain water as well as it used to, and so adding something like fruit to your water will help your body retain the water better so that you body is getting the hydration it needs.  At the time of reading that article I did it, but was not religious about it, and eventually forgot about it, until my yoga teaching suggested this.

Now very often, in addition to just adding lemon or cucumber to my water, I will toss a few strawberries, or whatever fruit I have in the freezer, and fill the rest of the blender with water, or coconut water :) and throw that into the mix of my drinks for the day.  Its easy, plus a great way to add a little more nutrients into you diet!  Today in preparing for yoga I added only a few cubes of frozen mango, filled the blender with coconut water, and some chia seeds after blending.  It was delicious, thirst quenching and satisfying!  And it also didn't fill me up, where as if I made a full on smoothie, I would have felt a little too full for class.

While you don't necessarily need to be a Yogi to try this out, this hydration technique will also be very beneficial to anyone that does any kind of high intensity training or workouts, like cross fit or athletes, if you live or are traveling in a hot location.  Heat sick is NO fun, simply add a lemon to your water bottle before you venture out, it will make your day so much better.  And of course if you are day drinking or wine tasting.  If you're at a bar then this will be super easy for you to do, so try it out, and see how much better you feel the next day.  You can simply ask your server for any garnish in your water, a lemon or lime will probably be the easiest, but if you are somewhere nice, why not request a strawberry, orange slice or a cucumber? 

Cheers!
​Jessica

Hello friends!

I wish you all the best year yet, full of dreams and wishes come true, abundance, happiness, and health.  For some reason I am just so excited for this year!  I'm not exactly sure why, but I am enjoying this excitement.  Typically most of us set a new years resolution which is great, but this year I am going to suggest something a little different.  

Instead of setting a new years resolution, which often revolves around giving up something, I am going to suggest tweaking, replacing, creating and adding things.  I promise these tiny shifts will create big changes in your life, because it has for me.  Maybe you won't see any results right away, but one day you'll notice, "wow, I'm a lot happier, healthier or better off financially than before!"

1. Create a playlist of songs you absolutely love AND the lyrics are uplifting/have a positive message.  I have this playlist on youtube, when I hear a song that matches both of these criteria I add it to my playlist, all of my songs are uplifting with a positive message, about winning, lasting love, encouragement, or just plain being happy.  "I can't stop the feeling" by Justin Timberlake is the epitome of what I mean.  Thank you so much for creating such an incredible song! 

2.  Rock out to these songs!  Who cares if you are a bad dancer, if you drove past me today you would have saw this crazy chick completely rocking out to her incredible playlist!!!!

3. Meditate.  5 minutes and hour... It doesn't matter, just do it.  There are youtube videos for those of you that think there is supposed to be a certain way to do it.  All else fails just sit down, set a timer and close your eyes.  There is no wrong way, its ok if your mind won't stop racing.  There are hundreds of approaches to meditating, try all of them and see which one suits you!

4. Learn something new.  Try a new recipe, implement something interesting from a book, follow a youtube tutorial that you like, or ask a friend or family member to teach you something you think they are really good at.  Talk about an incredible compliment!

5.  Try eating Vegan or Gluten Free one day a week.  Both have excellent health benefits.  I am Vegan Gluten Free, my transition was very slow, see my article about becoming gluten free under the "Wellness" category.  Eating Vegan will definitely save you money, at the very least a couple dollars on your meal if you go out to eat.  So try it out, just one day a week. 

6. Spend more time outside.  How ever it suits you, the outdoors has so many incredible benefits.  Not to mention a natural incredible source of vitamin D that we all need. My favorite is to go for a walk in the morning with my tea or coffee.  

7.  Get a plant for inside your home.  If you are a plant person like me, then you already have them, yay! But if you automatically say "I am only good at killing plants"  Look into succulents, snake plants or the potos plant.  All of these plants are very hearty, if you forget to water them they will most likely come back to life pretty easily, and don't need too much sunlight.

8.  Toss something that does not line up with who you want to become.  Right now :) Stand up and find something that doesn't suit you anymore.  I toss something, just one thing every month.  This helps a lot to keep my home up to date with who I am becoming.  Maybe even play catch up from this past year and toss 12 things!

9.  Replace your lotion with olive oil or coconut oil.  Not only is this cheaper for you, both immediately but also long term, but its SO much healthier for your skin, hair and body.  Lotion naturally has a lot of chemicals.  That lotion that smells so good has a lot of chemicals to make it smell so good.  Ever since I began using coconut oil as my lotion my skin has gotten so much softer, and once its rubbed in it smells like nothing.

10. Replace your cleaning products with more natural chemical free alternatives.  Clean with white vinegar instead of windex, use essential oils in place of your 409...  Or simply buy Seventh Generation cleaning products instead of the typical name brand cleaning products most of us are familiar with.  Personally I am switching to essential oils, just like my yoga studio.

11.  Compost!  If you have the space or means.  This simple switch in habit is hugely beneficial to the health of our earth.  Not to mention you could be creating the most rich and nutrient soil for your plants :)

12.  Take 5 minutes to do an "I Like List" or a Gratitude list.  I got this from Abraham Hicks, and I LOVE it.  I do this everyday, I take a piece of paper and just ramble what ever I like or am thankful for, most of the time I mix both in.  There's not wrong way to do this, its super fun, and immediately it puts you in a better mood.  If you were already happy, that happiness will be taken to a higher level.

13.  Record all the good things through out the day.  I have a tiny note book that I bought at staples for .50 cents.  And as something good happens through out the day I write it down.  You could also record in in your phone...  I think this is my most recent habit I have take on, and also the one where I see the biggest impact.  I also include something I love about myself, and how far I have come in the past two years.

14. Take 5 minutes every single day to work on a goal you have, in addition to what you already have planned for the day.  I do this with exercise, as a part of my routine for getting ready for the day.  I set a timer for 5 minutes, and always start with sit-ups, as I get to tired to do any more, I switch to planks, push ups, donkey kicks...  But you can do this with anything.

15.  Make your home something you LOVE.  Start with cleaning and organizing, then as you come across something you absolutely love find a way to incorporate it into your home.  Maybe replace the bedding, pillows, dishes...  OR hire a professional.

16.  Hire a professional to help you achieve or create something that you want.  There is something so amazing about working with a professional to catapult you into what you want to achieve.  It may be expensive, but its worth it.  You are worth it.

17. Affirmations.  Man are these powerful.  If you don't know where to start just look up "affirmations" on youtube.  You can simply listen and repeat affirmations from a recording, or you could make up your own.  Now I make up my own, I do them while I am exercising or driving.  You simply say a statement that feels good to you it doesn't matter if it is true yet.  The key is that the statement feels good as you are saying it.  Sometimes I'll just keep saying different statements until one feels good, then I'll keep repeating that one.  Sometimes what felt good yesterday will not feel good the next day and that is ok.

18.  Drink more water :)  if you already drink lots of water switch it up by adding fruit or tea into the water, and add coconut water into the mix.  Drinking water with fruit or tea hels your body retain the hydration better.  After doing hot yoga every day and feeling dehydrated even though I drank a gallon of water a day is what led me to this amazing suggestion from my incredible yoga teacher.  It works very well :)

19.  Turn off the news.  If you like to be informed, read the news articles that speak to you.  Do not watch the news.  The news has so many subliminal messages that we simply do not need.  If you read the news instead, you have time to digest what you are reading, and think about the validity, or the authors opinion.  It may even lead you to something else you'd like to know more about.

20.  Save a specific amount of money in a savings account.  Even just $5 a month will add up.  And that will not hurt your wallet.  If you are already a good saver, awesome!  Learn something else that will improve your financial IQ, like investing, and put it into practice.

21.  Take on the "no complaint" challenge.  Check out the book "A Complaint Free World" by Will Bowen.  The link is long, but here it is.  This is such a powerful challenge, that I am starting again.  Last time it took me a year and 22 days, and I was so proud of myself that I stuck with it.  But the coolest thing is that people were noticing.  I was noticing how much my life was getting better in all areas.  So no complaining for 21 consecutive days, if you do you start over.  I dare you! :)

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/p/complaint-free-world-will-bowen/1100831828/2677371894439?st=PLA&sid=BNB_DRS_Core+Catch-All,+Low_00000000&2sid=Google_&sourceId=PLGoP79700&gclid=Cj0KCQiA1afSBRD2ARIsAEvBsNnULBIQ6Hoy_N4A4U8lzUeE2TegxdsHr-KkkiudKP2_YvMAVdWD9xQaAkKaEALw_wcB

22.  Do something for the pure and simple joy and fun of it.  Every day.  Often we forget to do fun things, its so easy to get caught up in the rat race, but this will shift your energy and help attract the exact thing that you are working so hard to get.

23. Laugh, even if that is fake laughing in front of the mirror.  It works :)  

24.  Read.  You know how powerful reading is, so pick a book that interests you and enjoy :)

25.  Celebrate or give back to someone else.  This one just makes me smile.  And something I will be focusing on this year.

26. Experiment.  With an attitude of curiosity you can make huge shifts in your life!  Some experiments I did this year, was smoothies for the month of September, and hot yoga every day for three weeks in October.  With the attitude of "I wonder what will happen" I am significantly healthier because of it.  And just more excited about life in general.

Do you have any tweaks, or adjustments that have worked for you?  E-mail them to me and I'll add them to the list!   We are always growing, so lets put intention to grow into the person we want to become!  Rather that doing a resolution of something you will quit or give up, bring a different approach to 2018, an approach of curiosity, inclusion, and ease.  By changing a habit you change your life.  All of these habits are things that I do, and a few of them are things I will incorporate into my life more often.  I'm so excited for 2018, and cannot wait to see all the wonderful things that are in store.  

Sending you love!
Jessica

 Good morning and Happy Holidays!
 Its Christmas Eve tomorrow, and I can feel a lot of excitement all over my body, similar to how I would get as a kid, before opening presents.  Except now as an adult, yes opening presents is very fun, my excitement is around what's coming after Christmas.  

Today I woke up, and said I want to cuddle up, drink my tea, and write :)  And as I piled all the pillows around me to "cuddle up" I felt so excited like a little kid.  PS, this is my new favorite thing I think, to cuddle up with lots of pillows and feel like a kid, its really fun, I recommend you try it! Anyway I pulled out my journal to write, I opened up to what I wrote the other day about the direction and the things I want for 2018, and I thought "No! I want to post an article!"  My normal routine is to get a little exercise in before I do anything else, I really love to walk around my neighborhood with my coffee or tea, but today my inspiration led me else where.  

So reading my most recent thoughts in my journal, I'd like to share them with you!  Where ever you are in your life right now, what would it take for you to make 2018 your best year ever?  I challenge you to sit with this question, be open to it.  Its ok if you don't come up with an answer.

As I was writing about this I broke it down into 6 categories:
Writing/Creativity
Finances
Health/Body
Fun
Internal
Relationships

What are the top six areas in your life?  I know many people like to have a new years resolution, but I'm going to challenge this idea.  A new years resolution is only one goal.  I think we make a lot more progress if we have a couple goals (at least three)  because sometimes attention to that certain area needs a break, AND when one area of your life gets better all areas of your life usually get better too.

Now take a minute, or 10 to think about the top areas of your life.
All set? Great!
Now we can go back to those categories and write out our goals for each category, I'll share mine:

Writing/Creativity: (this is kind of two categories, so I actually have 7 areas)
I want to write one article a week (on here, as of now I just write when I feel like it & have time), so now I intend to set aside time.
Creativity: I want to be more recognized for my creativity, I want to do creative things more often.
Finances: I want to have $2,000 in my checking at its low point and my car paid off.  This is roughly $7,000 on top of my normal income/expenses.
Health/Body: I want to have a flat stomach with my same size breasts, so I want to flatten and tone up without loosing weight. And do at least two hot yoga classes a week.
Fun:  I just want to have way more fun.  I want to do more active adventures.  When I go out with my friends I want to do more physical activities.  With my best friends we do, so maybe just to hang out more :)  As I'm writing this article I realize that there is a seminar I want to go to, so I am going to invite several people that I want to hang out with more.
Internal: I want to feel unconditional love for myself every day and stop judging myself and have a completely clean place.  When I get busy or overwhelmed things tend to pile up, so I want to keep my place clean all the time.
Relationships: I'd like to not be affected my what some of my family members say.  I want a boyfriend, one is looking like it will evolve into what I want :)  And I'd like to hang out with my Dad more.  I also want to be the type of person that only speaks good and lifts people up, with those closest to me, when they frustrate me I have a hard time speaking good :)

And there you have it! Here are my intentions or goals for the coming year, but I still wonder is having these goals what will help bring the best year ever?  I don't know, and I am open to being re-directed.  I am more excited to live according to questions that are coming up are as well:

What would happen if I tried to give my best value to everyone around me?
What beliefs can I change to bring the best, happiest, most abundant, love filled year yet?

Who knows!  And I can't wait to find out.  For me, the next step that I can see/understand is to get my place in order.  So I am committing minimum one hour a day to cleaning, organizing, and being on top of things.  My goal is to start 2018 with a place that is 100% in order!

I challenge you to post one of these questions somewhere in your house, and follow the inspiration each time it comes up, weather its to drive a different way to work, write affirmations on your water bottles, call up and old friend, or snuggle up on the couch with lots of pillows like a child.  Just do it, see what happens :)  If you're smiling then that is the right direction!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Holidays, and Happy 2018!

Hello friends,

I have not posted in a while.  I think out of self judgement.  When I write these articles I get so wrapped up in them, that often I end up not "starting" my day until noon or 1 pm.  And so none of the ideas I was having was "good enough" to "waste" that much time.  But I just had a gratitude epiphany, and want to share it.  

About two weeks ago, I was exposed to some toxic fumes.  I was at work, the area smelled bad, but I over looked it because we were in a rush.  Until I was told to get off.  About 10 minutes later I began to not feel that great, but I don't like complaining so I was not very loud about what I was experiencing.  Later we get checked out my doctors and the doctors completely blow off the seriousness and sign me off as good to work again.  During that week, I learn a little more, what all the potential side effects of this toxic exposure can cause, and I am terrified.  Since that exposure, I had been doing every detox thing I can think of or that anybody I trust suggested.  Thankfully my symptoms have gotten improved a little each day, and now I believe I will be OK.  BUT because of this scare I have really been prioritizing my rest and health.  I have not been pushing myself, and then just now as I was enjoying taking 30 minutes to cook my breakfast, and enjoy my tea, I realized that up until now it was never OK to rest, it caused anxiety that I was "wasting" time. 

Now I am grateful for this exposure because it gave me permission to slow down, to sit here cuddled up with a warm blanket and a body pillow that makes me feel like I'm a child surrounded by all my lovies (stuffed animals).  And I am truly enjoying it.  I enjoy the comfort, I enjoy feeling like a child, that is being hugged by my lovies.

Relaxing is so important, we all "know" that - but I'm betting that there are more people similar to me than not - when you "do nothing" you are wasting time which could also be costly, if you're a time is money person.  Because of this very scary thing, I took relaxing seriously, and now I do see the benefits.  I am happier, I feel heard (because I'm listening to myself) and I feel love because I am allowing myself to feel like a child, and I'm seeing great creative solution, of which I have implemented.  In my external world I met a guy that is so similar to me its funny, my finances are improving simply because I'm not spending as much money, my health is improving because I'm taking the time to cook and eat more vegetables, I feel the support from my supervisors who have taken what happened seriously, and I just feel more loved.  Now I feel grateful that this happened.

I needed this bad and very scary thing to happen to me to give myself permission to rest.  I needed to learn that its OK to do nothing, and just hug a pillow, otherwise I would probably have worn myself into the ground by not letting up.

Before you need something bad to happen to learn a lesson like I did, what can you do today to scale back a bit?  Would that be to meditate, would it be to not answer e-mails after 4 pm?  Maybe you too will pile pillows on your couch and snuggle up with a blanket and a good book, or a journal?  I don't believe tv, social media, or surfing the internet is truly relaxing, because your mind is still doing something, and there is still a sense of achievement that is sought out, especially when surfing the internet, so just let the electronics stay off for a bit.  Maybe you even start a thing at home where one night a week all electronics are turned off?  Maybe you will let someone cook dinner or let a friend pick up the kids?  Whatever it may be, pick something today even if its just 5 minutes that takes something off your plate, makes your life a bit easier; or just put everything on hold so you can do nothing.  You are WAY more important than all of these other things that you "need" to do.  So start practicing that today <3

Sending cuddles, Jessica